Insulting Bob Dole is not cool

Endless Perspectives - episode 31863

"Bob, how old are you at this particular point in time?" asks Scott.
"What kind of question is that, young man?!" demands Bob Dole. "Remember, it's people like me who fought in the war for your freedom! Look at my arm here! I have a bum left arm from Germany to insure little whippersnappers like you have complete freedom!"

Scott, not hearing the words "from Germany", speaks up. "So did you fight at Gettysburg or Richmond?"
"What?!" asked an astonished Dole.
"Bob, did you vote for President Lincoln when he ran? Or Harrison?"
"Scott, I am not that old!" replied Dole. "Oh, I know!" cackles Scott. "You fought in the Revolutionary War! You were on Beethoven's boat when they were crossing the river on their way to Nashville! You probably signed the Consitution too!"
Bob is disgusted. "Will you be serious for five minutes?"

Eventually, Scott has asked Bob about fighting in the French & Indian War, the Hundred Years' War, and alongside Joshua at the battle of Jericho, when the walls came a' tumbling down. And Dole is getting more disgusted as we go along. Then Bob...

  1. ...kicked Scott square in the nads.
  2. ...ran away screaming.
  3. ...saw George Bush and told Scott to make fun of him.
  4. ...thinks sitting through multiple viewings of Manos: The Hands of Fate would be a lot less painful than listening to Scott attempt to be funny.
  5. ...dies of a heart attack at age 482.
    (What? He's not that old yet?!)
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Ben McClellan

Wed Jan 27 20:14:42 1999

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